When I was half my age...

[jim_p]

While going through stuff and packing I came across a diary I had started back when I was a senior at MIT... I was almost exactly half the age I am now. It was a terribly angstful time in my life; I'm not normally moved to write my thoughts down unless I find them very troubling. Reading it now, I feel rather sad for the poor, confused young man I was back then. I was depressed, lonely, paranoid, and totally misinformed as to how how people really worked (I had absorbed the lessons my parents had taught me, which it turned out served more to keep me convenient than to teach me useful people skills).

I had mixed feelings... on the one hand, I'm glad to have some confirmation that I've come a ways since then. On the other hand, part of me would like to go back and give that poor young man a bouquet of clues. Maybe fewer years of my life would have been wasted in confusion and depression if someone had come by at some point with the clues I really needed, instead of the well-meaning platitudes I kept getting...

Comments

[angelovernh.livejournal.com]

perhaps you could share some of the clues you needed then as they might help another on your list NOW.. ?

[jim-p.livejournal.com]

hmmm... you're on my list :) Are you in need of any Clues that I might be able to help you with?

[rmd.livejournal.com]

Reading it now, I feel rather sad for the poor, confused young man I was back then. I was depressed, lonely, paranoid, and totally misinformed as to how how people really worked

yeah, i feel bad for the girl i was at that age.

i'm not sure you can take in those important clues before you're ready, though. it's not just the clue but the process of aquiring it.

[jim-p.livejournal.com]

Yeah, that's the thing. I could help that particular young man because I know him intimately; I would know exactly how to present the Clues so that he could make the best use of them.

Much as I try to "pay it forward" by offering Clues to those in need now, I find that often they just don't take very well precisely because the recipient isn't ready or I don't know how they need to hear it...

It's very frustrating...

[inlaterdays.livejournal.com]

i still don't understand how people work. :/

See also:

[shoebox-bird.livejournal.com]

"Youth is Wasted On The Youth"

:)